My University Deterred Me from Reporting My Rape: One Woman Speaks Out
You don’t realize how much you’ve taken for granted until you’re terrified of being alone, until insomnia becomes your only friend, until the pain you go through every day becomes crippling, and until the silence in your mind becomes your worst nightmare. I never imagined that I would wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, my face bloody, because my mind was reliving the rape and I was digging my nails into my face.
In reality, living through rape and the trauma that follows isn’t the way it’s depicted on TV dramas or movies. For me, the months after my rape were dark. I left the university and moved to Chicago, where I spent the rest of the semester attempting to recover. I grasped onto every small piece of hope and happiness that I could. I watched the sun rise and set and learned to appreciate the smallest things. I learned to appreciate simply being alive.
Perspective heals; I learned to reframe my rape, to transform my pain and suffering into something that I could appreciate, something that is now a part of who I am—but does not define me.
Video: Reimagining masculinity; my journey as a male sexual assault survivor | Landon Wilcock | TEDxQueensU
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